I'm Not Okay (I Promise)
by NeverFadeInTheDark
Summary: "Cause if you just stop breathing,I'll stop-I'll stop my heart, I'll stop breathing too."Taken from her life,Brittany must adjust to leading a life of crime. On the run,she begins to fall for the stranger in the hoodie,just as she settles into it,they engage in the ultimate heist, and when it goes wrong,it will test the bonds of their relationship. But how far is she willing to go?
1. Chapter 1

_+29 days _

_I stare at the pale figure before me. She's quiet, calm. But seems nervous._

_"Hello. My name is Dave. You can call me Mr. Seville."_

_She nods, "Hey Dave."_

_"I'm going to talk to you about what happened. Is that alright?"_

_She hardens up a bit, "Depends."_

_"Were you hurt?"_

_"Nahh. Cuffs could be tight, but that's pretty much it."_

_I make a mental note to ask about those cuffs. "What about your broken wrist? The bruise on your arm? The swollen lip? The limp you've got? You going to try to defend him?"_

_She smiles at me, bemused. "He didn't give me any of them. That was you lot and your goddamn flashy entries, that was. The rest I got from a jerk who tried to mess me up."_

_"Do you know who he was? Or will you at least tell me why he hurt you?"_

_"Well, me and Alvie were shopping, and I was bored, so I start reading the backs of things, you know, batteries, crisps, stuff by the till whilst Alvie payed. Next thing, there's alarms, and I'm being called a thief. He runs over, grabs my arm, I get away, and he punhces me. Alvie's out the door. I get away, and then there's a gunshot, and the dude's on the floor, squirmin' next thing, killer pain in my leg, but we had to flee, didn't we? Kicked 'im the face, the bastard."_

_"You mentioned cuffs being too tight?"_

_"Yeah. But they weren't normally. Only if I was bad."_

_I shake my head, "Why did he have cuffs?"_

_She smiles at me, "We bought them."_

_"We?"_

_"Yeah, me and Alvie, also bought an awesome collar too, suited me."_

_Yup. Nut-case over here. "Okay then... What were the cuffs for? Did he rape you?"_

_She looks at me incredulously, "At first it was so I didn't get away, and then I realised I didn't want to get away, and just kept them for the comfort they gave. And no, he did not rape me." Then, she pulls on a playful smile and deliberately lowers her voice, and says, with a laugh barely hidden behind her words, "It's not rape if you enjoy it." and winks at me._

_I'm taken aback, but she quickly informs she was messing with me._

_"Okay... Well, what happened that first day?"_

* * *

He bursts in through the door and points the gun at the clerk, a young woman who throws her hands in the air. I watched as he throws a duffle bag over to her, and adjusts his Bandit Hat as she loads all the money into the till. I don't think he notices when she pushes the silent alarm, but he makes a point of turning his gun at each of the three shoppers in the store. It would be me, wouldn't it? I would be the only one who feels the need to go and buy some pop at half bloody one in the morning.

His eyes lock with mine as the siren goes off nearby.

And in the time it takes him to close the gap between us, the police come crashing in through the door. I know it's only a single car, probably with only two cops in it. The cop raises his gun, "Police! You're under arrest!"

As I stand, frozen, I feel him point the barrel of his gun at the side of my head, I don't know if it's cocked, or even loaded for crying out loud, but I do know better than to move. The police officer stays steady, and says calmly, "Sir, put the gun down. Let the girl go."

He laughs wickedly behind me, and pushes the gun harder into the side of my head, tilting my head slightly.

"No."

"Sir... You wouldn't shoot her."

"When I saw run, you run. Stop and I'll shoot, understood?" He whispers roughly into my ear. I nod quietly, hiding behind the tears on my face.

Then, he turns his attention back to the officer, "Actually, if you knew me better, you would know that yes, I would in fact shoot her. And I'll do it in a heartbeat if you try to stop me. Understood?"

He walks over to the cashier, dragging me with him, and tells me to hold the bag. Then, he whispers into my ear, "Run." And pulls the gun from my head to shoot the officer, he gets him in the knee, and he collapses to the floor. I sprint for the door, but he grabs my wrist, and runs off down the street. I half run, and am half-dragged along behind him, and eventually he slows to a stop.

"Good. Now, give me that." he grabs the money from me, and checks the street, before grabbing my wrist again. "I can't walk around with a gun to your head, so behave." We walk down a dark street, to what I presume is his car. I can't see it clearly, but I know there's something in a bag on the back seat. He unlocks it, a silver range rover with darkened windows, common nowadays. And pushes me into the passenger seat, and closes the door, and walks around the car, pointing the gun at me the whole time.

I can't help it. I start sobbing uncontrollably. I like life, I have sisters, and a cat that visits me a lot. I don't want to die. I can imagine the news, 'Teenagers body discovered in ditch with bullet through head.' I can't die like that!

I bury my face in my hands, and the man climbs in opposite me. He leans over, but rather than touching me, he reaches behind him, and dumps the duffel bag there, before grabbing the other bag and placing it on his lap. He pulls out a pair of leather handcuffs, with a short chain going through the middle and places them on the dashboard. Then he puts the bag behind me, so he can reach it easier.

He grabs the cuffs, and looks at me, his eyes the only part of him visible through the mask he's wearing. My eyes widen, and I shake my head, gasping out a few quiet 'No, please' 's but he leans over, and clips them around my hands, securing them together. "So you don't run off."

Then, he places the key in the ignition, and turns to me.

"What's your name?"

I sob louder.

"I'm expecting an answer."

"Gahh." I groan out, and shut up immediately as my right cheek burns hot. He pulls his hand away, and asks again.

"I don't want to hurt you, so just tell me."

I sniff, "B-B-Brittany." I manage to choke out.

"Age?"

"Sixteen."

He sighs, "That's perfect. Just perfect."

He places a hand on my knee, and I flinch away, he won't do that. Oh god, no, he won't.

"I know what you're thinking. No, I'm not going to rape you. Don't worry." I fidget with the cuffs, and then look up at him.

"Can't you just take me back?"

"Doesn't work like that. Sorry."

I give up like I know I'm supposed to, and look down again as he starts the engine and drives out of the car park and down the street.

I don't say another word to him for several hours.

* * *

I shake my head slightly, and wonder why the pillow is so soft. The one in my apartment is shitty, so I can't be there. I feel my wrist hitch on something as I stretch, and realize it's a handcuff. Everything from last night comes back to me, from the pop craving, right up to falling asleep in the car.

I groan, and realise in doing so that my mouth is gagged. Perfect. That's brilliant. My eyes spring open, and I see nothing but black. So I'm blindfolded too now? Blindfolded, gagged, and being given a killer kink in the neck by this goddamn pillow. Wait a sec... Pillow? Oh god, I'm lying on a bed, aren't I? No... Still fully clothed. So then...

The shower I hadn't realised was running turns off, and there's the sound of someone stepping out of it. I try to calm both my breathing and my thoughts, which are working on overtime.

Shortly, he steps out of the bathroom. I whimper to myself quietly, but he obviously hears it, as he walks over and says in a calm voice, "Ah, so you're awake. Good. Listen, I didn't want to use these cuffs on you, I know they're a bit uncomfortable. We can get you a new set today, okay?"

Seeing as I'm unable to do anything else, I nod.

"Listen to me a sec sugar. I still have my gun, okay? So when I take the gag off, don't scream, okay?"

I nod again.

"Good girl. Now, remember; just do exactly what I say, and no one gets hurt. Got it?"

I nod once more. And he unclips the handcuff that's holding me to the headboard, his hands gentle and warm. Careful not to hurt me.

Then, he sits me up, and I don't resist. He tilts my head forward slightly, and gently undoes the gag, before he places it on the bed beside me. He leaves the Blindfold on, and I don't take it off.

I hear him shuffle about a bit, and then he says, "Okay, have a look at these. Take that off." I take the gag off, and see him standing holding several black bags. He's not wearing his mask, and his short brown hair floats in strange angles off his head. His tanned face almost seems to glow, and his amber eyes seem entrancing.

Almost, this guy kidnapped me and is holding me hostage, no thinking like that.

He walks over, arms extended with the bags, and hands them to me. "I'm not gonna look. But I just need to know you aren't going to run off, okay?"

I nod, and accept the bags of clothing, he turns his back.

I open up the bags, and empty the contents on the bed. There are several pairs of blouses, skirts, tights, shoes, and a couple of jackets. "um, All of them?"

"just choose what you want to wear today. They should all be the right size."

I nod to myself, and pull on first a black blouse. It's pretty low-cut, when I notice several sets of underclothes lurking at the bottom of the bag. I mutter a silent thanks, and quickly strip. Throwing my dirty clothes to the side, and pulling on the underclothes. With my legs, arms and stomach exposed I feel extremely vulnerable. Then, I grab the black blouse, and pull it on. It's low-cut, and I feel skimpy, but I don't want to stand around in only underwear and a top with my captor sanding just across from me.

I grab at some black stockings, and pull them up, and damn, he was right, they do fit. And a red skirt, yes. I pull it up, before realising how short it is, and pull it down slightly.

"I'm err... I'm done."

He turns around, and grins widely at me, "You look awesome sugar." I fidget a little, and he smiles at me. Then, he walks over to another bag, smaller, that he didn't give to me, and pulls out a belt. "Think this will go?"

I nod, because a) I don't want to anger or upset him, and b) because it probably would go. He passes it to me, and I put it around my waist, and nod in satisfaction once it's in place.

"Okay. Now..." he rummages in the bag again, and pulls out large hoop earrings, "I noticed your ears are pierced, so... These would probably help with out story. Okay?" I nod, and put them on.

"Now, makeup. I'm pretty sure you know how to apply makeup, even though you're not actually wearing any."

He pulls out several tabs of black makeup and hands them to me, I take hold of them, "Listen, we're going for the bad-ass punk girl, think you pull that off sugar?"

I nod my head solemnly. he throws them at me, and I manage to catch them, and place them on the bed next to me. I start applying pale foundation, when the man sits next to me on the bed. "Is anyone going to miss you Britt?"

I shake my head.

"Perfect. Now keep going with your make-up, whilst I explain a few things for you, alright?"

I don't reply, and he doesn't wait for me to. "We are, to be blunt, going to be visiting a sex shop. It's only for cuffs, maybe some other things if I feel like it. Act calm. That's the key. Flirt if you're up to it, we're a young couple experimenting. Don't pull anything funny. Don't run off. And do not, talk to anyone other than me. How you behave today will determine whether or not I take you out with me on these little trips or leave you cuffed and gagged in a cupboard or closet for several hours at a time."

i blink nervously, which really doesn't help as I rub in the glittery gray eye-shadow. Then apply black eye-liner.

"Tonight, I'm going to leave you here. You may be out during the week, though only for short periods of time. Each night, you will sleep on the bed, or the floor, if you misbehave. You should get used to the idea of being a fugitive. I'm probably going to use in some robbery or another."

It takes a moment for me to realise how completely calm I am being about this, not crying, kicking, screaming. Nope, not even an abnormal heart rate.

I grab the black lipstick. It's on. He smiles at me.

"What do I call you? 'Man' ?"

He grins like a bloody Cheshire cat at me, "You can call me Alvie. Come on, car."

I follow him quietly out the door.


	2. Chapter 2

_+ 2 days_

We climb out of the car, and wonder in, Alvie leads the way confidently over to the handcuffs area, handily hidden behind a large panel. I follow, down, and he turns suddenly on me.

"okay, what's more inconspicuous? A couple, who both look like they're fine being in a sex shop, or a couple in which one looks like she might scream and run? Pull on that badass chick thing. You look good like that."

I nod, and tousle up my hair a bit. He turns his attention back to the wall.

"Ooh, wha to choose? Sugar, come here and choose a pair."

I take a look, and think about a) which would be most comfortable, and b) which ones won't upset Alvie too much.

I reach up, and pull down a pair of black leather cuffs. They feel comfortable enough, and are studded, with two larger hoops on either side. I don't know what the hoops are for, but the choice seems to make Alvie happy. He grabs another pair, and tells me to take them nd wait at the checkout, which I do so.

A few minutes later, he tells me to look the other way, so I'll be surprised at what he's gotten me. I do so worriedly.

We walk out to the car, and climb inside, and Alvie doesn't seem to feel like he should be pointing his gun at me, and it stays safely in his coat. He offers me some bubble gum, which I accept, and then starts driving.

We don't go back to the hotel though, we end up parked in an old parking lot. Alvie switches off the engine, and turns to me. He reaches over, and grabs the bag.

First, he pulls out the two pairs of black handcuffs, and places them on my lap out of his way.

Then, he pulls out some bungee cord, and hands that over too.

Next, he pulls out a black leather collar, exactly the same as the cuffs, with a clip-in vice at the back, which lights up.

"Lean over."

I start to, and he reaches his hands into his coat, I bend my head forwards.

"good girl." he purrs, and starts putting it on. I make a point of not gagging or cringing, and lean back up. It's comfortable, granted, and damn, do I look good in it, but it's still a collar, a sign Of ownership over me.

"Okay, you've been a good girl so far, so I'm not gonna put this up to high, but.."

I yelp as a shock of electricity suddenly courses through me. He nods to. Himself, and outs the tiny remote in his coat pocket.

"I also got you these, because they'd look good on you."

He pulls out two more hand cuffs, however, they are just single, not chain or anything, and asks me to put my foot on the seat, I do so, and he clips one around my ankle, and then repeats the process with my other foot.

"Now, seatbelt."

I pull my seatbelt back on, and he starts driving again.

"We're going to go back home, and then tomorrow well go to a tattoo parlour. In order to pull off your look, I'm sorry, we're going to get your hair cut, and dyed."

"But.." my protest dies on my lips, I'd quite like a hair cut.

"What style?"

"However you want it cut, but dyed black, okay?"

I nod, and Think about it.

"Stay here, try not to move, otherwise the alarm is gonna go off, and the collar will come into its own. Okay?"

I nod, and he climbs out the car, and walks casually into the store.

I want to run, unbuckle my seatbelt, climb out the window, and keg it, but I also want to live, and continue to do so. I stay put.

"Alright, lets get back to the room."

Once we're back, he says he's going to go and dye his hair, and then have a shower. He leads me over to the bed, and I sit down, exhausted. He brings one of my hands up, and cuffs it to the bedpost, and then turns to go.

"Alvie? How... How long was I out for?"

He thinks a moment, "day and a half."

He leaves.

I bring my knees up to my chest, and bury my face in my hands.

Eventually, he emerges, and undoes my cuff, leading me into the bathroom. I sit down on the side of the tub, and he pulls out some scissors and dye.

"How short?"

I gesture to a bit below my ears, and he nods, and starts cutting off the hair. I watch as it falls to the floor, and in practically no time at all, he's finished. He grabs the dye, and begins applying it. Once he's down that, he locks the window, and pockets the key, before leaving me to have a shower. There's fresh towels in the cupboard, and I put them by the side.

It doesn't take me long, and once I'm all dry, andredressed again, there's a hair dryer by a mirror.

I look good. As bad as I want to deny it, I look damn good.

Wait... The collar, and the cuffs around my hands and feet are still on lace, and don't appear damagedby the water at all.

I run one of my hands under the tap, and watch in despair as the water runs straight over it.

Just my bloody luck.

I dry my hair, and walk back into the lounge, Alvie smiles up at me from the couch,hthere he's perched over a pizza.

"I found a section for role play at the back of the shop, I think it was for a prison warden or soemthing, but they look comfy enough, and should fit."

He throws over a pair of grey Shorts, and a loose grey t-shirt. I change in the bathroom, and emerge, and goddammit, he's right, they fit, and look good in me, and they're comfortable.

"Err... Could I.. Could I have some of that?"

He frowns, and looks down at the pizza, he pats the couch next to him, "Sure. Take a seat."

I sit, and grab a slice, eating it ravenously, not having eaten in two and half days really does something to you. Once I've had my fill, I walk over ot eh fridge, and grab a bottle of soda, "Do you mind?" I ask, he nods, and I open it, drinking it all in no time at all.

I sit down on the couch next to Alvie again, and we're on the TV.

"...Who broke into a 7/11 and robbed the tills of cash, gun drawn. He was believed to have taken a victim, but no-one has come forward with any information as to who she is. If you know anything about her, please call this number. Back over to you, Sam."

A badly drawn picture of me flashed across the screen, along with a number, before it cut back to the studio.

Why? I would have thought Eleanor, or at least Jeanette would have noticed that I've gone missing, or seen the news. Why haven't they said something?

Maybe they haven't noticed yet, maybe they haven't seen the news...

Or maybe they forgot.

What if they forgot? Or didn't want to call in? I know I could be a bit sometimes, but... No, they wouldn't do that, would they?

Barely holding back tears, I stand up, and stumble into the bedroom, collapsing in ahead on the bed.

They my sisters, they wouldn't do that...

Would they?

* * *

_+3 days_

_"Yeah, This is Jeanette. Ellie, come over, now."_

_She hung up on her sister, and sat down, another cup of coffee in her hands._

_Her younger sister burst in through the door, "Jeanette!"_

_"Ellie, sit down."_

_"Okay..."_

_"Do you remember Simon, Theodore and Alvin?"_

_Ellie nodded._

_"Do you remember when Alvin accidentally knocked Brittany off her bike, and she lost memory of the boys?"_

_Ellie nodded again._

_"good. have you seen the papers?"_

_Jeanette slid the paper I front of her across the table, it took Ellie moments to understand..._

_"Alvin's back?"_

_Jeanette nodded._

_"And he has Brittany."_


End file.
